Extreme fatuousness in marketing


In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

• On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping. (That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
• On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)
• On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."(and that would be???....)
• On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."(but, it's just a suggestion.)
• On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down." (well. duh, a bit late, huh!)
  On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating." (and you thought????...)
  On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me time?)
• On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)
• On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."(...I'm taking this because???....)
  On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."(as opposed to what?)
• On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
• On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)
• On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: say what?)
• On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
• On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (or arms, Sean ;) (Oh my God ..... was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even chuckle) ......

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